David is a man with a great sense of humor and a positive attitude despite the twists and turns in his life.

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Describing his religious journey, he started by saying that his parents had no church affiliation. However, when he was about four years old, his mother thought he should have religious training and attend Sunday School. At that time, his mother sent him to the local Southern Baptist Church, probably chosen based on its proximity to his home. His parents did not attend. When he asked his mother why she didn’t come with him, her response was “I don’t have anything to wear.”  His dad was non-religious. During this period, he was a “wretched alcoholic” and thought God would save him, so he went to the church to be baptized. They immersed his whole body in the water, but unfortunately the water heater was broken that day and the water was freezing. David said that his father came up spluttering and wanting to curse. His involvement in the church lasted about a month, and he never attended church again. 

Despite it all, David continued to attend the church and even played the piano for the church when he was about age ten.

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Around age twelve David sensed that Sunday School wasn't right for him. He thinks he’s really a spiritual person and always sought to believe in something, but this wasn’t it. He’d read a lot of science fiction and bought into the Book of Revolutions’ depiction of the end of the world, and he wanted to be on the right side of that battle!

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With that in mind, he embarked on a religious exploration journey, His parents accepted his adventure. He said his parents were used to his eccentricities. “I wasn’t a normal kid,” he said. He described himself as “weird,” always doing different things. He said he didn’t play sports. Instead, he liked to read science fiction books and watch old movies.

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His journey involved visiting different churches. He said there weren’t a lot to choose from in his hometown (at least as far as he knew), but he visited the Mormon church and the Catholic Church. He laughs now when he realizes there wasn’t a Scientology Church and “they “might have gotten” him! 

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In time he was introduced to Jehovah's Witnesses through his niece and became deeply involved in the Jehovah's Witnesses community during his junior high and high school years. They believe Jesus is coming back “very soon,” he said, “That’s how they bring people in,” and it worked for him. Involvement grew – “slow and steady’ – first attending Bible studies three times a week and then, he remembers, going door-to-door for the Jehovah’s Witness. 

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He had a great circle of friends there and a feeling of belonging. The community provided him with crucial social support during challenging times. David said he sees himself as a social person, and the Jehovah’s provided for him a haven. He had few friends at school since he was gay and introverted and attended a rough school being beaten up weekly. Today he credits the religion with helping him through those difficult teenage years. As he looks back, he thanks them for his time with them. “Who knows where I’d be if it hadn’t been for them,” he says.

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David described being baptized as a Witness at age sixteen. Unlike Catholics who baptize children by “dribbling water” on babies, the Jehovah Witness community believes it necessary to make a rational decision at an older age to choose the truth. David said, “they call their path “the truth.” 

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It was a “big deal.” Many people gathered at a large pool built in Dodger Stadium to be baptized, with Witnesses attending from many places. David learned then that baptism was considered essential; if a person later turned away, they would lose the promise of salvation. He said Witnesses do not believe in a fiery hell. Instead, they believe that when you die, you simply cease to exist.  “As an atheist, that’s what I believe: you just cease to exist,” he interjected.

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Over time, he found the religion's concepts didn't make sense. “It was hogwash,” he said. He read widely of religious studies and developed questions about the origins of the faith. He asked, “Who came up with this take on Christianity?” but he couldn’t get answers. He found the door-to-door activity curious. When the Witness volunteer goes to the door, he records his call in a notebook. It was, he thought, a kind if “civil servant” accounting system with volunteers recording calls as if working toward salvation. 

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Leaving Jehovah's Witnesses and Coming Out

​He decided to leave the community. Was he concerned about the losing the promise of being with God? “Well, it was so petty. It didn’t make sense to me.” He took the unusual step of writing a letter to the elders saying he chose to disassociate himself from the religion – something no one in Southern California had ever done. He told them he didn’t want to be fired; he quit. His niece was appalled and called to say that the elders wanted to talk to him. He told her in his nicest tone, “Tell the elders to go XXX themselves.”

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At nearly the same time, David came out as gay to his parents. His mother cried for three months and had questions about the details of gay relationships. “How do you have sex?” His father was disgusted, though David suspected that he already knew. 

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David mentioned at the point that his father was a character with a colorful past – an alcoholic, a bouncer at a brothel, dishonorably discharged from the military after having sex with his commanding officer’s wife, and a bar tender at Brown Derby.

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Continuing his Journey

After leaving the church, David avoided churches for several years due to residual beliefs of being demonized for entering another church. Jehovah Witness members didn’t observe Christmas with lights and decoration. David, on the other hand, loved the festivity and recalls once he had to leave a Christmas service at an Episcopal church due to overwhelming anxiety from the ornate decor. 

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He later explored Buddhism which he understood as a way of life rather than a religion. He said, “I tried. I appreciated what Buddhism taught, but I never became a regular practitioner or meditator.”

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Spiritual Awakening and Life Perspective

At age thirty, David had a life-changing experience after seeing the appearance of a comedian, Julie Sweeney, in her one-woman show, “Letting Go of God.” Julie Sweeney was known for her comedic representative of Pat, a sexually ambiguous character on Saturday Night Live, 1990-1994.  In her one-women autobiographic show, which was personal, funny and surprisingly philosophical, she shared her deeply Catholic upbringing, how a religious experience sparked her curiosity, and a long period of reading science and philosophy. She concluded that she no longer believed in God and adopted a humanist view of life, coming to terms with the fact that there is no afterlife. She reframed that to mean that life becomes more precious. It’s finite with meaning arising from how we live and treat others now. 

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This was a spiritual awakening. This realization about existence had a significant impact on David. The show gave him the words to express his beliefs. Looking back, he realizes that this experience influenced his life perspective, making him more aware of the importance of living fully each day. He feels blessed with his husband Barry, with whom he has been for forty-six years.

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He realized, “I may not have an afterlife, but we have something more: meaning. We have consciousness, which is an amazing gift. As an atheist, I realize that I’ve been so lucky. I’ve had a blessed life. Everything is finite. I don’t live for afterlife.” He expressed a certain envy for people who find spiritual certainty, while maintaining his own skepticism.

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David noted that while Barry is Jewish, Barry is uncomfortable with his religious background and is similarly disconnected from spiritual matters.

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Homosexuality, Religious Journey, and Atheism

Viewing his journey from being a Jehovah's Witness to atheist, David sees how his religious opposition to LGBTQ rights also shaped his views. He remembers attacks on gays by Jerry Fallwell and Anita Bryant, battling for 30 years for rights. He was angry at that time but tries now to let go. More recently, he was disappointed to learn about the Dalai Lama's negative stance on homosexuality, having thought attitudes had changed. Since being gay goes against both Jewish and Christian historical teaching, he’s unsure the new attitude will stick. In the future, he thinks Trump may let the new attitude stay, and he thinks both Rubio or Vance will be okay with gay marriage.

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Today, he reads “hardcore fiction’ - not sci-fi, which he considers for young people. He recently started reading Project Hail Mary, by Andrew Weir but “threw it across the room,” when he saw it was about saving the earth from disaster. He said he’s not reading religious books anymore.

He says that when he goes into a monastery, he’s drawn into that life, believing the trappings of the material world are a distraction. But he says with a smile, “I love all my material possessions!!”

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He’s sometimes embarrassed to admit that he was a Jehovah Witness, but he said, “I’m, however, not angry. They are good people, and I met a lot of nice people. They are not trying to hurt anyone.”

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This is man with a positive attitude.